Wrestling

We recently completed a 3 day staff retreat with TMFI. The subject matter was Strengthening the Soul of Your Leadership. Of the many lessons I learned during the sessions, the hardest was found during a activity dealing with solitude and hearing from God. After each of three readings of a passage in Numbers, we were asked to sit and be quiet before God for 2-3 minutes and listen for the answer to the question "What does God want me to do the next few days?" The words I was hearing from the Lord seemed to say "trust me". I preface the rest of this by saying that Kerry and I had been discussing our future plans, plans we did not want to give up. Later that day we were challenged about maintaining a Rhythm of Prayer and Action- Discerning and Doing the will of God. The first step in this was a prayer of indifference. This does not mean indifference to a situation , but after much prayer, indifference to the outcome because you trust God's will and goodness. A prayer of God's Will-nothing more, nothing less, nothing else. Wow! I was really struggling. I sat by myself in solitude wrestling with God. In fact, I wished for an actual angel to wrestle, like Jacob, so that I may have a little chance of keeping MY plans. After a long struggle I finally conceded to God and prayed, I trust you God, whatever happens is OK. Kerry reminded me of Proverbs 16:9, a verse she had been given the day before, "In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps." I am now at peace, regardless of how our future plans work out, I know it will be what God has planned for us. We will continue to serve Him however and wherever He calls, and hope to glorify Him in all we do.